Experimental Process Restart Reference-dnafjm-06-11-2014/2

Posted in Uncategorized on November 22, 2014 by Unknown

Days One – Six:

Visual Aura:

My vision is still good. I have noticed that I don’t always need to wear sunglasses when I am out as they seem to be less sensitive. Having said that, I don’t push it and still prefer to wear them on brighter days, but the need to have them with me all the time is reduced. The auras have either stopped or are so faint that I can barely discern them as auras.

Sensory:

I have noticed that the numbness and tingling sensations in my extremities has also gotten much better. I do still have a heightened sensitivity to sound, but less so with smell.

Motor:

The pains that I normally suffer are mostly gone. I do still have these pains, however they are now few and far between.

Cognitive:

Finding words is still a problem and I find that when I speak too fast, I started to stutter. I feel more focused and more inclined to engage in new projects (see summary below).

Digestive:

My appetite has improved greatly too. This is the most noticeable improvement and, not only that, but are better than they have ever been.

Fluid disturbances:

Dehydration has also dropped off. I no longer wake in the night and I am drinking less in the daytime.

Mental/Personality:

even though I have had an ‘episode’ and the Postdrome took a few days to clear, I recovered much more quickly than normal and I am surprised at the way the recovery took place. The headache was the last to go, but the rest of it cleared up within a day or so. I do not seem to be suffering with any/all of the symptoms of F.H.M since either. This is the best news. As I wrote in a previous blog, perhaps it is part of the regeneration of the damaged cells. I do seem to have more energy and a sense of well being is present.

Digestive:

No vomiting, no intolerance of food odors, no diarrhea or constipation, no loss of appetite.

Skin:

My hands and feet do not feel cold and clammy. I am still very pale also. The mild facial swelling is also gone but I do still have black circles under my eyes though even this is getting better.

Respiratory:

No frequent yawning. Still sighing slightly more often than normal, however not to the extent that it may be a symptom of F.H.M. No hyperventilating.

Circulatory:

Mild change in blood pressure. Less difficulty regulating temperature. Still present are changes in heart rhythms.

Summary:

Having restarted the course, I feel more optimistic than ever. So much so that I am planning on  getting back to my old way of life before these episodes started, before I was misdiagnosed even. I have been talking to a friend and feel I am ready to start horse-riding again. I am also making plans for next year, to go out and enjoy all the things I used to love. Arts and Crafts festivals etc. I am even thinking about starting new professional projects again and even have an idea for a really big project in the making. Should things continue in the manner, I am even considering going open air concerts again (just small ones though). I am so happy that I am at this point noticeably better, even after such a short time of taking the DNA Force, but I am still cautious.

On a side note, I was advised to talk to my friends about the whole situation regarding my being misdiagnosed with Bi-Polar Disorder and I also felt confident enough to do that today. They were very supportive of me and they have said that they have noticed a positive change in me. An ‘inner’ determination’ and vitality that has been missing for many years now.

To be Continued

Reference-dnafjm-06-11-2014/1 Supplemental

Posted in Uncategorized on November 16, 2014 by Unknown

Apart from researching whether F.H.M. can be slowed down using herbal supplements, I have also been researching Auras.

Auras are the second part of a 4 part episode. The first is ‘Prodrome’ and can serve as a warning of an impending episode. It can start hours or days before the episode itself, however, I am still learning my triggers, so haven’t quite got to that point. I am currently looking at phase 2.

As those who suffer F.H.M. know, auras can appear in different colours and it is my intent to discover if the aura is an indication of the episode to follow.

To date the colours of the auras that I experience are: Blue, Green, Gold, Red, White, Orange, Purple and Black.

As I said in my last post, I felt an episode was imminent and I was not wrong.

Four days ago, as I was getting ready to leave the house for work, I was looking for something (as you do like keys, or gloves for excample). As I was searching I was becoming more stressed over the fact that I was going to be late for work. I could feel the ‘burn’ up the back of my neck and into the back of my head. Eventually I found what I was looking for and set off to work. On the way the pain continued over the right side of my head and face, causing my eye to water. I know I SHOULD have gone home, but hoped it would pass. Just a quick note here. I have a tablet called Zolmitriptan. When I feel an episode approaching, I have to take one of these pills no later than 15 minutes after the episode starts, however, because I haven’t had an episode for several weeks, I didn’t have them with me. My bad. The idea behind the ‘triptans’ is that they dilate the blood vessels in the brain to allow the flow of blood and natural chemicals (Endorphins, adrenaline etc) to flow freely, reducing pain. This is known as ‘Phase 3′

Before this happened, I had been ‘seeing’ a blue aura for a few days (an indication an episode is on the way. Sadly you can experience an aura without any symptoms of an FHM episode, and the auras can’t tell you how long it will be before the episode strikes. Or can it?)

Okay, so from past studies, this is what I know about Blue auras:

Blue – Lethargy, Dubbing Down (speech getting slower, difficulty concentrating, neck pain, burning pain in back of head. face feeling like its swelling, pain in right eye and mild watering of said eye. Mild nausea). Reduced heartbeat and discomfort of the heart area, followed by symptoms of TIA, pain in chest, pain/numbness in right arm.  Pins and Needles in fingers/hand/toes. Uncontrollable need to sleep. Loss of speech and concentration.

So once I arrived at work, I did alert my bosses to the fact I was experiencing some difficulties. My employers are the best. They know what I have and they know how it affects me, so I have no reluctance or hesitation in telling them when an episode is imminent. Normally I work at a computer terminal, inputting data, however, due to the epileptic symptoms of FHM (fugue states caused by repetition etc), PC work was not going to help. I had other work to do, but after three hours, I could barely keep my eyes open and couldn’t concentrate. I left early and on the way home suffered the symptoms of a TIA (Trans Ischemic Attack). This time though my toes went completely numb and well as my arm, hand and fingers. That’s new. By the time I got home, I couldn’t really function and could only go to bed.

This brings me to a conversation I had many years ago, with the family doctor.  I have mentioned before how wonderful our brains are. It is a truly fabulous piece of kit. Did you know, for example, that your brain stem contains a ‘fail-safe’? Me neither. What this does is shut down your body during times of increased trauma or stress (fainting). So, for example, if you have been involved in an accident, your brain will activate the ‘fail-safe’ in order to help your body deal with any pain you may be suffering as a result of that accident. Losing a loved one is the same. Some people find the pain of losing a loved one (especially unexpectedly), so traumatic that their brain will shut down the body until it feels the mind can deal with that loss. It’s also how we shut out certain traumatic incidents from childhood. How amazing is that?

Okay, so back to four days ago. I got home and the ‘fail-safe’ was activated. In F.H.M. terms, this simulates a comatose state. When this happens to me, I can be unconscious for up to 18 hours. This time was no different. I ‘fell asleep’ as soon as I got home on Wednesday and was only able to GET up and move about on Friday (aside from using the bathroom, however I am not ‘aware’ of those things happening at the time. Insignificant I guess).

Now ‘getting up’ is not the same as ‘ I am better’. Getting up means just that. I can get up and I can move about, but I couldn’t do a maths equation or solve the worlds’ hunger problems, that’s for sure. The most I can do is function at the most basic of levels. Conversations are not going to happen. This is Phase Four – Postdrome:

Many people mention feeling “hung-over” after a Migraine. This is often actually part of the Migraine, the Postdrome. Most F.H.M. sufferers have some symptoms after the headache phase, symptoms that may last hours or even a couple of days.

Postdrome symptoms may include:

fatigue, lowered intellect levels, lowered mood levels, especially depression, or feelings of well-being and euphoria, poor concentration and comprehension.

So this is were I am today. Still recovering, going through the Postdrome. Why am I blogging this? Well, as I have said before, it’s important to me, that I record everything that relates to my ‘experiment’ with DNA Force. Whilst there was never any doubt in my mind that DNA Force could not repair cells that have been damaged too badly, or are in fact dead already, it makes me wonder if a) I have left it too late or b) these attacks may be the result of cells that are already dead/damaged, so perhaps the DNA Force can prevent these attacks from getting worse or more intense?.

Incidentally, whilst going through this episode I was unable to ingest the herbal supplements, so I guess I am going to have to start again. Also, I realize that there may well be something in my theory that the colour of the aura is important in the F.H.M. process. From my experience I am aware that the ‘Blue Aura Episodes’ are the same or so closely similar as to make no difference. That, I feel, is very important.

So to summarize: Blue Auras may be connected with simulations of Epilepsy, Coma, and TIA. Now, the big question here, is it possible to avoid the episode, knowing what the colour associated with it may be?

Knowing now that the blue aura is associated with these symptoms, what can I do differently? Perhaps knowing this, I can be more alert to situations that may cause stress? Example: Instead of ignoring the aura and then stressing about not be able to find something (like I did on Wednesday) maybe I could be aware of that aura and know that a) the stress of looking for that thing, is likely to start an episode, so leave it and b) Just call into work and let them know I am going to be late, thereby giving myself a chance to either realize the episode is getting worse or give myself time to see if the episode is going to take hold and therefore stopping it getting worse by trying harder to function normally, thereby making it worse (as I did).

I am ending this blog with the following advice. I subscribe to Migraine.com and The Migraine Trust and I read everything they have to offer. It has been such a big help and it was those sites that led me to study auras. Sometimes though, even I miss the ‘signs’ lol. For example: I know from research that when I have a problem concentrating or to retrieve a particular word, I should stop trying because I will only make it worse.

Imagine a time when you bumped into a friend, only you forgot their name. It’s there ‘on the tip of your tongue’ but the harder you try, the more illusive it becomes? this is the same, however in trying to retrieve that name, or word, I make it worse. Had I recognized this last week, maybe I could have saved myself all this trouble? Who knows.

Incidentally, after 15 minutes of searching for the object that started all this, I found it. In my pocket. Go figure.

Experimental Process Reference-dnafjm-06-11-2014/1

Posted in Uncategorized on November 9, 2014 by Unknown

Days Two – Five

I decided to re-work this blog, as I felt it didn’t cover everything. I have used the blog I wrote previously, called: http://jetzification.wordpress.com/2014/07/26/honda-had-it-right-can-hate-be-good/ as a template for my research.

Visual Aura:

I have noticed that my vision is sharper. I am able to detect sharp lines where before they were blurred. The auras I experience have also changed. They are less bright and less frequent.

Sensory:

I have also noticed that the numbness and tingling sensations in my extremities are lessened too. They seem to be less sensitive to touch. I still have a heightened sensitivity to light, sounds and smells, however I am not concerned about this right now. It is not possible for me to determine if what I smell is actually present as I live alone and have no-one to ask. I shall look into this more carefully in the coming weeks.

Motor:

The pains that are with me continuously because of the Meningismus are also lessened to the point where I have mobility in my neck and shoulders and in my hip. Over the past few weeks, a journey that used to take me 30 minutes to walk, was taking 40. Since starting this project I am able to move about quite easily. I do still have these pains, however I don’t feel the need to take anything for them, as they are more uncomfortable than painful.

Cognitive:

I still have some difficulty in ‘finding’ words, however I find that I have suffered no fugues, since this project started. I have less mental confusion, disorientation and impaired consciousness. Please refer to comments below for self analysis.

Digestive:

My appetite has improved greatly too. This is the most noticeable improvement. I still crave carbohydrates though, however it is controllable. Also reduced is the stomach rumblings and constipation.

Fluid disturbances:

I still have an increased thirst, however it is not so great now that I have woken in the night to quench that thirst as I have previously done most nights. The need to urinate frequently has also reduced. This may possibly be the lack of fluid intake though. Analysis will need to be maintained.

Mental/Personality:

I have not had a migraine since inception. Note: This doesn’t actually mean anything. I have gone several weeks without an episode, though for those weeks I did suffer other symptoms of F.H.M. I have had a headache, but perhaps there are other reasons for this. Possibly the headaches are just headaches (due to sitting at a computer all day for example, or changes in the weather) or perhaps it is part of the regeneration of the damaged cells. I do seem to have more energy. I don’t feel lethargic or fatigued as much and I am less anxious and nervous and whilst euphoria (a sense of well being is a symptom of F.H.M) is present, I am unable to determine at this time, whether this is due to the supplement or the disease. More research required in this area.

Digestive:

Mild nausea, however no vomiting, intolerance of food odors, diarrhea or constipation :-) Due to mild nausea, I still suffer a loss of appetite however this is much less frequent and overall, my appetite is very good.

Skin:

My hands and feet do still feel cold and clammy at times. I am still very pale also. I have mild facial swelling and still have mildly bloodshot eyes, though this does seem to be improving, however, the black circles under my eyes are still quite distinct.

Respiratory:

No frequent yawning. Still sighing more often. No hyperventilating. Mild nasal congestion. Mild runny nose.

Circulatory:

Mild change in blood pressure. Less difficulty regulating temperature. Still present are changes in heart rhythms.

 

So I left it a few days before I posted my initial results. I am still not sure if it psychological or whether I am actually seeing improvements.

Okay, so possibly that was just my mind. Our minds are incredible things. I have read some eastern documents that suggest we can heal ourselves just using our minds. So, let’s imagine that is true, until we can be certain.

It’s important to me, that I am objective with regards to DNA Force. I want to heal myself of F.H.M but I want it to be explainable, you know? Hence my honesty in this report. I could have omitted to post about the changes that I haven’t experienced, such as the black circles under my eyes or the changes in heart rhythms, but that would make this experiment redundant, not helpful to anybody.

Originally, I thought I would only take half of the recommended dose of supplement, however, thinking on it more carefully, I think it’s better for me to take the required amount, until I get to the half way mark. I think this was a good decision reading back.

Once upon a time, I had a discussion with a professional friend about taking vitamins. Initially the conversation started with people who take too many vitamins and how to know what is the right amount. I asked my friend how you know if they work? He said you find out when you stop taking them, because you start to feel low again, just like before you started taking them. Why did I remember this conversation? Well I figure this is probably the same. I don’t actually ‘feel’ any different, but I guess something must be happening, as witnessed by my above report.

As I reported in my first record, one of the herbs has the ability to regulate the heart. I will be looking at this too, as I do have a slow heartbeat. I thought about this after lugging cat ‘crap’ (litter, food, toys) up the stairs. I seemed to recover much more quickly. So much so, that I was able to go back down and up those stairs one more time (forgot to pick up the mail, so I guess improving my memory takes a bit longer lol).

It would be folly for me to imagine that I would be ‘cured’ in just five days, and I don’t, however, I am very pleased with the results that are evident this early in this experiment. As I said earlier, much of these initial findings may just be false positives, as I have gone for a few weeks without having an F.H.M episode, however, I am very keen to find out more. Suddenly I am not dreading the next ‘attack’. I am not waiting for it to happen. I actually want it to happen (though I am not stupid enough to push that lol) in order to find out how DNA Force holds up against it.

So, overall, I feel quite hopeful. My wise old Grandma once told me “Expect the worst, yet hope for the Best”.

To be continued

Experimental Process Start. Reference: DNAFJM-06-11-2014

Posted in Uncategorized on November 6, 2014 by Unknown

….’And yet I am not mad, For tomorrow I die, and today I unburden my soul’

 Day One

Right, so today marks the start in what could be my greatest achievement or my greatest failure. I freely choose to record this event, in the hopes that others with the same condition (Familiar Hemiplegic Migraine) may find something helpful. In the worst case scenario, it will also be a great and detailed account of the time I completely screwed myself messing about with things I probably should leave to medical science lol :-)

So, I have had an MRI today that is the benchmark for my studies, and I will get the results of them in exactly 6 weeks and 5 days.

The DNA Force arrived, and I start taking that tonight before bed. Even though it is made purely from herbs, I choose to take them at night, so that I can bypass anything that may be regarded as a side effect. Below is a breakdown of the ingredients and what they do:

Astragalus Root Extract:

Astragalus is a natural dietary supplement that’s used for various health conditions. For instance, it’s used to treat the common cold, upper respiratory infections, fibromyalgia, and diabetes. Some proponents of astragalus use it for its heart benefits. They claim it may protect against heart disease. It’s also used to help improve overall weakness. Proponents also say Astragalus stimulates the spleen, liver, lungs, circulatory and urinary system.It’s also used to treat arthritis, asthma, and nervous conditions as well as to lower blood sugar and blood pressure.

Are There Side Effects With Astragalus?

Astragalus is usually taken in combination with other herbal supplements. When used appropriately, astragalus appears to be very safe and to have few side effects. Very high doses may suppress the immune system. So you should avoid using astragalus if you are taking immune-suppressing drugs.

Trans-Reversatrol:

Resveratrol might expand blood vessels and reduce the activity of cells important in blood clotting. Some research suggests that resveratrol has weak estrogen (a female hormone) effects. It may also decrease pain and swelling (inflammation).

Are There Side Effects With Trans-Reversatrol?

Resveratrol is LIKELY SAFE when used in the amounts found in foods. But there isn’t enough information available to know if resveratrol is safe in larger amounts.

Alpha-Lipoic Acid:

Some people use alpha-lipoic acid for memory loss, chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS), HIV/AIDS, cancer, liver disease, diseases of the heart and blood vessels (including a disorder called cardiac autonomic neuropathy) and Lyme disease. Alpha-lipoic acid is also used to treat eye-related disorders, such as damage to the retina, cataracts, glaucoma, and an eye disease called Wilson’s disease. Alpha-lipoic acid seems to help prevent certain kinds of cell damage in the body, and also restores vitamin levels such as vitamin E and vitamin C. There is also evidence that alpha-lipoic acid can improve the function and conduction of neurons in diabetes. Alpha-lipoic acid seems to work as an antioxidant, which means that it might provide protection to the brain under conditions of damage or injury. The antioxidant effects might also be helpful in certain liver diseases.

Are There Side Effects With Alpha-Lipoic Acid?

Alpha-lipoic acid can decrease blood sugar levels. Your diabetes medications might need to be adjusted by your healthcare provider. Taking alpha-lipoic acid might interfere with treatments for under-active or over-active thyroid.

Pomegranate P40p:

P40p contains high levels of antioxidants and natural compounds which may help to reduce the cell damage created by free radicals during the natural biological process in the body.

Are There Side Effects With Pomegranate P40p?

Unknown.

Rhodiola Rosea:

Rhodiola is used for increasing energy, stamina, strength and mental capacity; and as a so-called “adaptogen” to help the body adapt to and resist physical, chemical, and environmental stress. It is also used for improving athletic performance, shortening recovery time after long workouts, improving sexual function; for depression; and for heart disorders such as irregular heartbeat and high cholesterol. Some people use rhodiola for treating cancer, tuberculosis, and diabetes; preventing cold and flu, aging, and liver damage; improving hearing; strengthening the nervous system; and enhancing immunity. Rhodiola extracts might help protect cells from damage, regulate heartbeat, and have the potential for improving learning and memory. However, none of these effects have been studied in humans.

Are There Side Effects With Rhodiola Rosea?

Rhodiola is POSSIBLY SAFE when taken by mouth, short-term (for up to 6-10 weeks). The safety of long-term use is not known. The potential side effects of rhodiola are not known.

Rosavin:

Helps balance all neurotransmitters that may help control the level of cortisol. Optimizes energy levels. Improves endurance levels. Assists in incresing attention span. Enhances memory and mental performance. Increases physical strength and mobility. Helps to fight emotional stress.

Are There Side Effects With Rosavin?

heightened dreams and agitation at high quantities.

Kaneka Q10:

Numerous benefits including optimum production of cellular energy, enhancing stamina, improving overall state of health. A powerful antioxidant, it also prevents lipid peroxl radicals productoin, strengthens the immune system and fosters resistance to disease. Thousands of studies have been conducted and published on CoQ10 benefits for maintaining optimum health and healthy aging.

Are There Side Effects With Kaneka Q10?

Please consult your healthcare provider before using this product if you have a known or suspected allergy to yeast ingredients, if you are pregnant, breastfeeding, or currently taking any OTC or prescription medication(s) for a health condition.

Veganzyme:

May support healthy joint function and a healthy inflammatory response.Provides systemic support for wound healing. May help to reduce bloating, gas or indigestion from certain foods and food combinations. Aids the body in absorbing more nutrients from food. Supports healthy blood pressure by helping to maintain normal blood viscosity. Assist in rupturing the wall of Candida and other types of yeast and fungus in the digestive tract, potentially increasing the effectiveness of other supplements used to combat overgrowth. May help to thin mucus in lungs and sinus passages. Supports peristalsis (intestinal contractions) by reducing viscosity of the fibers in some plant-based food. Increases mineral availability by breaking down phytic acid from plants, grains and seeds. Help reduce harmful by-products of normal metabolic processes.

Are There Side Effects With Veganzyme?

None.

Bio PQQ:

PQQ is an essential nutrient. Research indicates that PQQ’s unique nutritional profile supports heart health and cognitive function — alone and in combination with CoQ10. PQQ supports heart cell function in the presence of free radicals and promotes blood flow in the heart muscle. When taken in combination with CoQ10PQQ has been shown to promote memory, attention, and cognition in maturing individuals. Clinically shown to induce mitochondrial biogenesis (growing new mitochondria) for more youthful cellular energy output.

Are There Side Effects With BioPQQ?

None.

Trans-Pterostilbene:

Emerging research suggests that pterostilbene may help to defend against a decrease in release of the neurotransmitter dopamine following exposure to an oxidative stressor (hydrogen peroxide). It is known that pterostilbene can have a protective effect on cortical areas of the brain, like the hippocampus.

Are There Side Effects With Trans-Pterostilbene?

None.

To be continued

 

DNA Force

Hate To Say I Told You So

Posted in Uncategorized on November 4, 2014 by Unknown

Did you read my blog titled: Actually I think it IS you afterall?

http://jetzification.wordpress.com/2013/01/27/actually-i-think-it-is-you-afterall/

In it I clearly said:

“I actually don’t think I have Bi-Polar at all”. I even went on to say “My doctor says I cant stop the meds, in case I have a ‘psychotic’ episode” – That was January 27 2013, some 22 months ago. 1 year and 10 months, back in the day.

Did I give up? Did I listen to the quack? Did I pay any attention at all to those people who said listen to your doctor? Well, did I?

No, of course not. Bloody idiots. No-one knows me better than I know me :-)

It’s taken nearly two years but today I received confirmation that I DO NOT HAVE BI-POLAR DISORDER!

Let’s have a quick recap. Symptoms of Bi-Polar Disorder:
Excessive Happiness
Excitement
Increased Energy
Need less Sleep
Racing Thoughts
High Sex Drive
Mania
Depression
Sadness
Anxiety
Loss of energy
Uncontrollable crying
Change in appetite
weight loss or gain
Increased need for sleep
Difficulty making decisions

Now, let’s Look at the symptoms of F.H.M that affects the same areas:

Fatigue, lethargy
Mood changes
Irritability
High energy
Depression
Anxiety
Nervousness
Euphoria, feeling of intense well-being
Mental Confusion

So for those who don’t know what they are looking at, it breaks down like this:
Of the 17 common indicators or symptoms of Bi-Polar Disorder, 12 are clearly indicators or symptoms of F.H.M. Have a look at the remaining 5 symptoms of Bi-Polar:

Need Less Sleep – This does not apply to F.H.M as it is a debilitating disease.
High Sex Drive – For those with F.H.M, sex is the last thing on their minds. Mostly their thoughts consist of ‘Please take the pain away. Please take the pain away’. Not conducive to love-making, is it?
Sadness – Well yes, this is actually a part of having F.H.M. It’s not exactly something to rejoice about, knowing that, at any given point you can be in a comatose state or partially paralyzed.
Uncontrollable crying – when the pain hits, crying is ‘normal’.
Looking at it like this, it’s pretty clear that of the 17 indicators or symptoms of Bi-Polar, 14 relate to F.H.M in some way and the remaining 3 are irrelevant. Possibly because one is a disorder and the other is a disease. Who knows?
Anyhoo, when I was diagnosed, I had to have an MRI scan. When the results of that came through, my GP informed me then that my scan showed ‘migraine’ activity. At that time, it kind of went by the wayside (disregarded as not connected). Over the years I have told him that I experience flashing lights (what I now know are called ‘auras’) ‘funny’ smells (medically termed: Phantasmia) hearing ‘things’ (medically termed: Auditory Hallucinations), food not tasting ‘right’ (Medically termed: Olfactory Hallucinations) however, because there was no context, he was unable to make a diagnosis. No context? Imagine if he took a look at the first scan that was done as a result of the diagnosis, showing migraine activity and looked at the symptoms of Bi-Polar disorder. Surely that would have been a clear indication that something else was going on here? No? Oh well. Not to worry. I will just spend 2190 days taking a dangerous drug to treat something I never had (not that I am counting or anything). I mean, what harm could that do, right?

So it was up to me to  push, argue, reason, cajole and elevate my concerns before FINALLY some-one else listened.

And here we are today.

I am going to write another blog in a bit, detailing how I am going to fight and WIN this battle with F.H.M. It’s controversial and many people have poo-pooed my ‘theory’ but fuck it. As I said: No-one knows me better than I do.

Right now I want to look at irony:

I have written before that I outed myself as having Bi-Polar, and my (very valid) reasons for doing so:

http://jetzification.wordpress.com/2013/01/30/with-love-from-jersey/:

“I have lost a lot of friends since I outed myself as having Bi-Polar. People who had known ‘me’ for several years. They were happy to be my friend. They accepted me the way I was (un-medicated) and yet, as soon as a label was put on me, they were gone. Well, bye-bye then, have a nice life.”

Since then I have had a few people trying to use this disorder as a weapon against me. People who obviously have no idea that I am open about it (I talk about it with people. All my friends know. I even did a two hour radio show about it). These people just never understood that the reason I chose to be pro-active was to take the stigma out of something many people know nothing about. I took a leaf out of Stephen Fry’s Book:

http://www.time-to-change.org.uk/news-media/celebrity-supporters/stephen-fry

In an attempt to enlighten and reassure. It was never about me. It was always about understanding something you dont know a thing about. Don’t hate something you don’t know. You have enough on your plate hating everything else, without that.

And now I find I don’t even HAVE it. Never did. Go figure.

celebrity-pictures-leonard-laurie-trust-doctor

Never Argue With An Idiot

Posted in Uncategorized on September 28, 2014 by Unknown

Wise Words.

Hello. Did you read my previous post? ‘Honda Had it Right – Can Hate be Good’?:

http://jetzification.wordpress.com/2014/07/26/honda-had-it-right-can-hate-be-good/

Well this post is a kind of follow-up from that. It’s bad enough having something you have no control over, but to have somebody who doesn’t know you or even HEARD of FHM (outside glossy mags) poke fun at you for trying to help yourself? Wow

http://www.gofundme.com/d9e3tc – Single Dad Needs New Car
http://www.gofundme.com/Support-MrfixitRick – Man asking for living expenses
http://www.gofundme.com/ekybfg – to go on a course
http://www.gofundme.com/Competitions-Pageants/ – to enter people into pageants
http://www.gofundme.com/ele25g – Politics

Whilst most of this fund-raising pages don’t SEEM important to many people, they obviously mean a lot to the people who created them. I created a page myself. I have never done one before so was quite nervous about it:

http://www.gofundme.com/daismk

I created this page on 20 August 2014. It doesn’t have many donations, but that’s okay. I mostly created it because I was reluctant to hand over my bank details online to friends who said they wanted to help.

Why am I posting about this today? Well because the other day some-body posted this (please note, I have removed about 40% of this post as it has nothing to do with me):

I have got this right haven’t I? The author of this ‘Report’ is clearly shown as
Reported By: Mxxx Rxxxxxx — Texas ?

How very extraordinary then that yet more blogs have appeared complaining that I am picking on her?

http://waronara.wordpress.com/2014/09/22/what-drives-you-on-can-drive-you-mad/

http://waronara.wordpress.com/2014/09/22/he-was-innocent-but-found-guilty-so-he-had-to-take-the-fall/

The problem with liars is that even should they very occasionally tell the truth no-one will believe them. As no-one other than Mxxx will put their names to the filth being written, and we know categorically that Mxxx is the leader and main instigator in all this harassment, an educated guess would lead any reader to surmise that Mxxx is still playing silly buggers writing these blogs whilst incredulously sending out a ‘cease and desist’ to her victims when they dare to rebut her lies. Perhaps when Mxxx is otherwise preoccupied, her nefarious sidekick ‘Jetz’ may take the helm, but it is a silly notion to expect any truth when dealing with either duplicitous woman  https://www.facebook.com/JetzMad

(note: I don’t know why she put my FB Timeline – It’s private, always has been. No-one can see anything on there unless they are friends)

Jetz is also extremely confused. She runs a blog radio show called http://www.blogtalkradio.com/commalaonlineradio/. She claims to have a spirit guide, and recently has told her ‘public’ that her brain is being eaten away. A month ago Jetz decided that the public should cough up for a monthly supplement (DNA Force™) to ‘cure’ her brain disease. The cost is approximately £80 a month so she created a fundraiser for herself called ‘Barmy For My Brain’  http://www.gofundme.com/daismk. Perhaps I should create a fundraiser for geriatric diapers in case I pee myself as I sit staring vacantly at the walls in the ‘virtual’ old folks home you have so kindly suggested in your blog is now my home. If you raise the money Jetz I hope you will share your health supplement with me, since you, and your equally nutty friends, have decided that I too have dementia.

 Seriously the condition Jetz describes, akin to dementia, hardly seems likely in view of her scoffing at the elderly for declining mental agility. So which is it? Is she scamming for money or does she find her own condition something to poke fun at?

  After running amok on social media with their nasty accusations, are these women by any chance hoping that a defense of ill health will exonerate them? Since they are huge fans of lies, assumptions and spreading rumours I am sure they agree that it is fair if I repeat a rumour that their mentor relies on a condition called Lyme disease to explain away what might appear to most as being too drunk to function as a rational person (link to recorded conversation).

As a radio broadcaster surely Jetz realises that audio broadcasts can be saved as MP3 files? I can assure Jetz that I do have the recording of Jxxxx being interviewed on your show (link to recording), why that should worry her and/or Mxxx is strange. Why on earth did you disable the broadcast Jetz? This was the show where you and Mxxx claim that Ms xx Cxxxix vindicated herself (by blaming others for her misfortune) to your complete satisfaction. Please save us the eternal protest that you three ‘ladies’ rely so heavily on, that you were hacked.

I wish I could say that this venue is fun. It is not. It has become a ‘freak show’ as a friend recently remarked. This report and rebuttals cannot be deleted. Thankfully somebody bought it to my attention and I have the opportunity to question the source/sources. If this report is a conspiracy then it is to your shame that you hung Mxxx out to dry, not mine. If any of you conspirators give a damn about Mxxx, a seriously mentally ill person, then show your names in the spirit of solidarity with her and stop wriggling out of it in silly anonymous blogs.

The reason that I refuse to be intimidated into shuffling away on my virtual walking frame by the people behind this report, and the multitude of blogs etc., is because they obsessively enjoy bullying; better me than a more sensitive individual falls prey to their insatiable lust for character assassination.

I DID left a rebuttal to these comments, but thought I would just mention a couple of things because clearly ‘Karen’ is making it up as she goes along.

1) I never ‘decided the public should cough up’. Nice try ‘Karen’ however, lets not forget that it was ‘Karen’ that shared this page via the Rip Off Report. It was ‘Karen’ that posted it on a site famous for not removing posts. How can ‘Karen’ possibly blame me for something she is doing? As I said a couple of times now, the page is for FRIENDS. FRIENDS have the page link. The ‘public’ haven’t. Well I mean they do now, but that’s because they saw it on Karen’s comment. Not my fault.

2) Nowhere on my page does it say anything about £80 A MONTH. What is she on??

Go Fund Me

Please do, show me where it says ‘£80 a MONTH’? As I said she is making it up as she goes along.

3) WHEN I raise the money, why would I share it with her? (cuckoo). I suggest if ‘Karen’ wants something that CAN help her with her ‘situation’ then she can create another fundraising page.

4) Again WOW. To suggest that I would lie about having something like FHM. Who in their right mind (no pun) would lie about having a disease that leaves them in a ‘comatose’ type state for days on end?

5) I have NEVER used my disease as an excuse for ANYTHING (except for not airing a radio show, but even then I don’t say its anything to do with FHM. I usually don’t offer an explanation). Please do note – ‘KAREN’ found the GoFundMe page. ‘KAREN’ posted it on the Rip off Report. ‘KAREN’ is the one that brought it up. I am not sure HOW she found the page though, given that I don’t advertise it. I can only surmise that she has been Googling me. Again.

6) WHY would I disable a show that I was quite proud of ‘Karen’? WHY would I take down a show that was showing as being one of the best (of the only 3 I had done at that time). WHY would I do that?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ppCYpHCAKnw

Please click this link and then tell me, did I really disable my own account?

7) The venue is not ‘fun’ for any of us either, but ‘Karen’ WILL insist on posting a heap of lies, forcing us to respond. Why can’t she just stop? Why must she insist on posting a whole heap of outright, provable LIES (£80 A MONTH! HA). Well I can only think of two reasons. Either she has got herself into a bit of a rut, where the ‘fight’ has been going on for so long, its part of her daily routine. OR, dementia forbids her from seeing that she posts, we respond. She posts, we respond. And on. And on. And on.

Now there is one thing I would like to thank ‘Karen’ for. Thank you for sharing my GoFundMe page. I really didn’t want to do that because I didn’t want to ask strangers for money, when I know everybody is strapped and their money could be better used elsewhere (like saving animals for example) but ‘Karen’ didn’t see it that way and ‘Karen’ posted it on the Rip Off Report. I am sure ‘Karen’ will have shared it on her Facebook pages too. And her ‘friends’ will have done the same. Thank you. THIS is the result of that sharing:

GFM(Although, after reading the rebuttals from ‘Karen’ I expect she will not accept my thanks for this. I suspect she will decide that I or Mxxx or Jxxxx actually donated this money or posted this comment. She might even suggest its fake, but you can see it on the page)

Never argue with an idiot because they will drag you down to their level and the beat you up with their experience

Honda had it Right – Can Hate be Good?

Posted in Uncategorized on July 26, 2014 by Unknown

‘Can hate be something we don’t hate?’

Normally I would say hate is never good. It’s a huge waste of time and energy, but I guess I have to re-evaluate that opinion.

In April 2014, I was diagnosed with FHM: Familial Hemiplegic Migraine. I have gone through (and probably STILL going through the 7 stages of grief:

Shock/Disbelief: What? How? WHAT?? All these years of pain and suffering and what I have amounts to nothing more than a bloody headache??? Are you kidding me??

Denial: How can it be just bad headaches? So, what is it all about? I cant possibly have that. It has to be more. I got home and checked it out on medical websites and this is what I found:

Hemiplegic Migraine – The Basics

To understand Hemiplegic Migraine, we have to understand that Migraine attacks are episodic manifestations of a genetic neurological disease. Migraine can present in a variety of ways. Hemiplegic Migraine is a rare form of Migraine, made more confusing by there being two variations: Familial Hemiplegic Migraine (FHM) and Sporadic Hemiplegic Migraine (SHM).

What are the symptoms? I am only going to post the ones that I experience:

Visual Aura (before the pain begins)

  • a bright shape that spreads across the visual field of one eye and appears to block some or all of the vision; can be seen whether the eye is open or closed
  • flashes of light and color
  • wavy lines
  • geometric patterns
  • blurred vision
  • partial loss of sight
  • Episodes of prolonged aura (up to several days or weeks)

Sensory

Motor

  • partial paralysis
  • weakness or heaviness in the limbs on one side of the body
  • Hemiplegia (paralysis on one side of the body)
  • Meningismus (symptoms of meningitis without the actual illness and accompanying inflammation)

Cognitive

  • mental confusion
  • disorientation
  • inability to concentrate
  • difficulty finding words
  • Impaired consciousness ranging from confusion to profound coma
  • The onset of the hemiplegia may be sudden and simulate a stroke

Digestive

Fluid disturbances

  • increased thirst
  • frequent urination
  • bloating/fluid retention

Mental/Personality

  • fatigue, lethargy
  • mood changes
  • irritability
  • high energy
  • irritability
  • depression
  • anxiety
  • nervousness
  • euphoria, feeling of intense well-being
  • Headache, which may begin before the hemiplegia or be absent

Digestive

  • nausea
  • vomiting
  • intolerance of food odors
  • loss of appetite
  • diarrhea
  • constipation

Skin

  • paleness
  • cold, clammy hands and feet
  • facial swelling
  • goose bumps
  • bloodshot eyes
  • black circles around eyes
  • sweating

Respiratory

Circulatory

  • changes in blood pressure
  • blood vessel dilation
  • difficulty regulating temperature
  • changes in heart rhythms

 

Bargaining: Right, but most of that sounds like Bi-Polar disorder. I accept FHM, but I refuse to believe I have both BPD AND FHM, so I am now waiting to have the BPD re-assessed. 

Guilt: What I hate is making plans to go out with friends and then having to cry off because I am barely conscious. I hate having to call in sick at work and I feel guilty because of the hangover:

“Postdrome” is the official term for that wrung out, exhausted, headachy feeling migraineurs experience after the most painful and intense phase of their migraine attack has passed. Calling this stage, the fourth in a migraine attack, a “migraine hangover” strikes a chord the clinical definition does not. The most active, intense part of the experience is over and you’re left dealing with the not-quite-right aftermath. All without the fun of drinking delicious adult beverages and laughing with your friends.

Not every migraineur experiences postdrome, though most do. In one study, 68% of participants had migraine hangover symptoms that lasted from a few hours to a couple days, with an average duration of 25.2 hours. Symptoms include of tiredness, difficulty concentrating, weakness, dizziness, lightheadedness, decreased energy, head pain, skin and scalp sensitivity, and mood change.

I first wrote about postdrome in 2007 and have collected more than 250 accounts of migraineurs’ experience with it. People describe the physical sensations as weighted down limbs, moving through mud, walking through quicksand, heaviness and numbness. Some say they feel like they’ve just run a marathon or been beaten up or hit by a truck. Though the pain isn’t as severe as in the height of the migraine, head pain is common and often exacerbated by coughing or sneezing, some say their head and brain feel bruised. Emotionally, people describe being easily agitated and annoyed, impatient, sad and depressed. A dense mental fog or haze, difficulty making decisions, mental confusion, and forgetfulness are also frequently reported symptoms.

Many migraineurs, both in studies and the stories I’ve collected, say that postdrome interferes with their work as well as their family and social relationships. Because the worst of the migraine is over, many feel like they should be able to get more done and feel guilty for not being productive. If you fall into this category — I certainly do — remember that the migraine is not over. You’re still experiencing symptoms, though not as intense, so try to go easy on yourself.

While knowing the medical terms used for migraine is helpful for talking with your doctor about your symptoms and experience, referring to a migraine hangover in social situations can help non-migraineurs understand the severity of the LEAST painful part of a migraine attack. Non-migraineurs think “hangover” and they think horrible headache and feeling wrung out. After I explained the similarities between alcohol and migraine hangovers to a friend, she asked, “You mean the migraine is even WORSE than that?” She was appropriately horrified when I said yes and that the hangover is actually a relief after the pain of the attack.

- Kerrie Smyres – Migraine.com

Anger: Angry?? Damn right I am angry. I have suffered this for years. Why has it only come about now? WHY do I have to have a disease that’s eating away at my brain?  Having joined a support forum I find that FHM CAN cause Epilepsy, Alzheimer, coma along with Permanent partial paralysis. WTF!!! Why is this happening to me?? WHY do I have to have THIS disease on top of all the other diseases and conditions?! When will things be good for ME!!!

Depression: Already, so many parts of my life have been affected. Before this I had never had a day sick, NEVER forgotten my boss/friends names. NEVER forgotten words. I feel angry because I KNOW I am not at my best, but I still feel guilty that I am not doing ‘normal’ everyday things. More important than all of that I am depressed because I feel angry and guilty over something I cant do a thing about. I feel depression knowing that there is no happy ending for me.

Acceptance/Hope: Yes, I now accept my lot. I have always been of the mind, if you cant change something, you should try to adjust to it and unless the MRI shows something different, then I can’t change this. Perhaps the word is not acceptance, perhaps the word is more ‘resignation’.

Hope? really? Your kidding? Okay so I COULD hope that I don’t get any of the more serious ‘stuff’. I live alone in a flat on the 3rd floor, so that would be an issue for me. My employers are amazing about this. After reading some of the stories, I am blessed that I have that, so I hope that I can do my best for them whilst I can. And sometimes, just sometimes when the pain is real bad, I hope this will be the last one. When I feel an attack, I usually post on FB something like ‘Shoot me. Shoot me now’. Whilst I love my friends, I hope they don’t realize I am being serious.

So back to the title: Can hate be good? I have to change my opinion and say YES because if I didn’t hate what this was doing to me, I wouldn’t so determined to find out everything about it. I know its uncurable, but it has just GOT to be manageable.

Hasn’t it?

 

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